Expected moral standards from ships' officers


Aly Jones

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Dec 15, 2019
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According to Edith Russels account in 1913- In conversation with the officers, the officers addressed the ladies as madam. That's being a gentleman and repecting women.
She also mentions calling the Officer -oh, MR.officer. I call that a little bit of flirting on her behalf. You can find her account on here, :) I do believe women found the officers attractive but didn't make bold moves unlike women today do. It's unlady like to make the first move back then.

Also months ago, I was watching period 1900 English youtube video, and in one scene, you witness a man grabbing a young lady by the arm and dragging her towards him, like she belonged to him. You can see they were flirting, both laughing but it appeared that he was going to have his way with her.
just wondering, the officers may had done that with the one they loved, after the courting etc..

ill try and find that video in question for you guys.
 
Nov 14, 2005
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According to Edith Russels account in 1913- In conversation with the officers, the officers addressed the ladies as madam. That's being a gentleman and repecting women.
She also mentions calling the Officer -oh, MR.officer. I call that a little bit of flirting on her behalf. You can find her account on here, :) I do believe women found the officers attractive but didn't make bold moves unlike women today do. It's unlady like to make the first move back then.

Also months ago, I was watching period 1900 English youtube video, and in one scene, you witness a man grabbing a young lady by the arm and dragging her towards him, like she belonged to him. You can see they were flirting, both laughing but it appeared that he was going to have his way with her.
just wondering, the officers may had done that with the one they loved, after the courting etc..

ill try and find that video in question for you guys.
Today if you called a lady madam you might get punched. I always hold the door open for everyone no matter who it is. In todays modern world I have gotten looks and huffs from women who looked at me like I'm a sexist pig for holding the door open for them. . That could be true (I could care less) but I always try to be polite. Its the way a lot of women want it to be these days. But a lot of that also falls on many of the men today. They don't want a wife and life partner...they just want a mommy 2.0. I see it all the time. Ok this is veering off subject of Titanic and the era so I'm going to be done with this thread. Oh I'm not facebook or any of the other social media to answer your question. Don't use them. Just a few message boards I post on. This being one of the better ones.
 

Arun Vajpey

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Apr 21, 2009
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Today if you called a lady madam you might get punched. I always hold the door open for everyone no matter who it is. In todays modern world I have gotten looks and huffs from women who looked at me like I'm a sexist pig for holding the door open for them.
I am not sure about that. At 64 years of age you might say I belong to the old school and am very uncomfortable with this new found pseudosocial overfamiliarity. I have often addressed a lady whom I don't know as "madam" and hold doors open for anyone. I really don't notice what response it elicits and frankly don't care because I like certain old-fashioned social norms. I neither encourage nor use first names right away and always call casual acquaintances as 'Mr' or 'Ms' (I admit that I like the neutral Ms). It annoys me no end when the answering service bods sounding some 40 years younger than me asking "May I call you Arun?" and I politely let them know that I am not comfortable with it.

That is one aspect of "New Brit" manners that I detest; surprisingly, things seem to be more conservative in America (where I have travelled very often) and addressing relative strangers as "sir" or " madam" is still thankfully common.
 

Arun Vajpey

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The new generation of young Americans, the ones born around the turn of the 21st century, seem to address everyone lately with, "Hey Dude. Can you tell me ...?"
I guess I meant people in my own age group. Having said that, whenever we have crossed over ( and have done that a lot), my wife often gets politely addressed as "ma'am" and I as "sir" by staff in malls, restaurants etc. I suppose as tourists we might not meet a lot of "ordinary folk" and modern social norms might be more similar everywhere than I want or like to believe. But wherever I am, I am uncomfortable when people I have just met start to expect first name terms or intrude on my personal space. I am a firm believer in the old adage "familiarity breeds contempt".
 

Aly Jones

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Dec 15, 2019
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That's the thing- I wish nothing had changed and we were still living in a society like theirs. What I mean is, So many manners, politeness, gentlemen, ladies etc... Like how Japanese society having changed in over 100 years. There isn't anything resembles the old British Edwardian days. I don't like our era. But live our technology that's it.
 

Aly Jones

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Dec 15, 2019
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I know lightoller had a rough background, I can imagine him in fights and punching people out. However, Murdoch, Moody, Boxhall, wilde, coming from middle class families and having that type of gentlemen personality that I can not imagine them being in a fight and punching people out. If it came to the crunch, will they raise their fists?
 

Aly Jones

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Dec 15, 2019
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Olympic officers perving on 1st class lady passenger. It may seem rude but that's actually politeness compared to today standards.
 

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