Social Graces Custom & Etiquette

LOL! No Geoff, the lack of facial hair verifies that this particular photo is of Granddad. Although I would be interested in said picture of Mr. Cook... would make a lovely companion piece to Granddad's photo. ; )
 
All this funereal talk puts me in mind of a funny story Lucile told in her memoirs about the Victorian actor J.L. Toole. In her youth Lucile was one of star Ellen Terry's circle of adoring handmaidens - today we'd call her a "groupie." Anyway, this is what she wrote:

"...There was something irresistably droll about his personality off the stage. I remember once his coming to supper with us at Ellen Terry's house in Barkston Gardens, into which she had moved. He had just got back from his wife's funeral and began what was meant to be a sad recital of the procession and service. Somehow, quite unconsciously, he made it so funny that he had us all in fits of laughter, although we did our best to smother our mirth out of decorum. In the end he began to laugh himself, till the tears ran down his cheeks. 'She would have laughed, too,' he said apologetically. 'It was awfully funny' ..."

That irreverent theatre crowd! My, my. Old Victoria would REALLY have not been amused over such levity.
 
While arranging a funeral today, the family requested an old hymn I had thought was Victorian and was a favorite of my granny's, In The Garden. It was written by C. Austin Miles in 1912 actually, he a Methodist from Lakehurst (of Hindenberg fame) New Jersey. It was a favorite for mourning- and shows here as 1913 when the sheet music appeared. The Cyber Hymnal is a great hymn source, which includes many Titanic Hymns in lyric and midi format.

In the Garden

Words and Music: C. Austin Miles, 1913
web.archive.org
 
Shelley, that got me thinking about another great hymn that was written by a man who lost his children in a shipwreck. I believe only his wife was saved. He took a ship to the other side of the ocean to meet his wife and asked the captain to let him know when they were at the spot where his children had died. The captain called upon him in the middle of the night and stayed with the man as he prayed for the souls of his daughters lost at sea. Upon returning to his cabin he penned the beloved hymn. Can't remember the name of the hymn just this minute, or the time it was written, or the ship that the family was on which sank, but for some reason I keep thinking of "Nearer My God to Thee."

Kyrila
 
Kyrila, that's a tough one! There are many hymns that use the sea and its dangers as symbols of the hazards of life. Many are probably forgotten now, by they used to be widely known, especially in the more evangelical circles. A few suggestions that could be worth checking.

Master, the Tempest is Raging.
Pull for the Shore, Sailor.
Jesus Saviour, Pilot Me.
Let the Lower Lights be Burning.
Throw out the Lifeline.

I'm sure there are more but my memories of a misspent youth in churches are fading. Of course, the hymn you are thinking of may not necessarily have mentioned the sea.
 
Dang, Bob! That's IT!!! "It Is Well With My Soul." While this link doesn't identify the two ships that collided, it gives the date of the accident as November 22nd, 1873, which should be a fine clue to their identities. The story goes that the songwriter, Horatio Spafford, was a good friend of evangelist, D.L. Moody. In 1870, he lost his only son. The following year, he lost all his real estate holdings in the Chicago fire. Pastor Moody then invited Spafford to join him in a tour of Great Britain to spread the gospel. Unfortunately, he was detained at the last minute and sent his wife and four daughters ahead of him. He planned to join them later. But the ship his family was on sank, taking his four daughters and only his wife survived. It was then on his trip to join his wife that he was overcome with peace as he sailed over the place where his daughters perished. He returned to his cabin and wrote the song that has brought peace to so many others who have suffered. Unfortunately, his own tragedies led to mental disturbances later in life and died in Israel at the age of 60. You can read all the lyrics at the link Bob posted.

Kyrila
 
Bravo, Bob! Listening to the tune, I can hear that it's in the style made familiar by Moody and Sankey during the late 1900s. Now to see if the sinking story is true!
 
See, Dave, I do know some clean ones (only a couple, though).

The ship was the liner Ville du Havre, which struck the sailing vessel Lochearn at 2am and went down in 12 minutes with the loss of 226 lives. The Spafford girls were Maggie, Tanetta, Anne and Bessie.
 
We sang "Eternal father, Strong to Save" in church this morning. If you read the lyrics, it's actually quite appropriate for what's going on in the world now, aside from being a beautiful hymn.
 
Eternal Father Strong to Save was, by some accounts, sung at the Sunday morning service on Titanic. It is sung every Sunday in Annapolis at the Naval Academy- and called The Navy Hymn , a custom introduced by choirmaster Lt. Cmdr Charles Jackson in 1865. I have also heard it called For Those in Peril on the Sea although the hymn tune in most hymnals is called Melita- the ancient name for the island of Malta. The lyrics were written by an Anglican clergyman named Whiting who had survived a Mediterranean tempest- the music by John Dykes, another Anglican clergyman, was written in 1861. If he sounds familiar it is because he also wrote the music for Col. Gracie's favorite, Lead Kindly Light- AND one version of Nearer My God to Thee! The Navy Hymn has added and changed verses many times over the years to reflect the times- I remember it being played when JFK's casket was going up the Capitol steps back in '63. For more on the lyrics- www history navy mil/faqs/faq53-1.html
 
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