Things We Don't Want To See


Status
Not open for further replies.
S

sharon rutman

Guest
The hands down winner in bad taste category goes to Keeping Up With The Steins, a movie comedy about over the top bar mitzvahs that's playing right now. One "theme" involves a replica of Titanic navigating through a sea of plastic icebergs with the kid standing at the bow yelling "I'm the king of the Torah!" The bar mitzvah brat all but drops and goes for it with the Kate Winslet look alike! If you don't believe me just check out the website at www.keepingupwiththesteins.com.and just get a load of the trailer! You can't make this stuff up but somebody did. On behalf of my fellow Jews I humbly apologize for this crap!
 

Jim Kalafus

Member
Dec 3, 2000
6,113
35
398
>You can't make this stuff up but somebody did.

One of the perverse joys of East Coast Living is that fiction pales to insignificance beside reality- particularly when it comes to weddings, coming out parties, bar mitzvahs and...yes...funerals. I have been at a wedding in which the members of the wedding party (me included) had to pull the bride around the dance floor in a Cinderella Coach made out of flowers while the guests tossed artificial roses; a second wedding at which a Trojan Horse full of wine was pulled into the center of the dance floor (the Groom had to sample it, proclaim it 'good' and then invite all the guests forward to fill their glasses) and at least three weddings at which food was dyed to match the bridesmaids' gowns; a bar mitzvah that was professionally filmed (the film survives- to the horror of the now 40 year old star. It had special effects. Ten of his closest friends and their dates stood beside the chair in which he was seated. Stop camera. Remove boys. Employ fade effect. In the film, the boys all vanish and the girls- resplendant in 1979 finery- freed of their dates, rush to embrace him. Yes. Really.) Then there was another wedding at which the entire catering staff swirled romantically around the darkened room holding burning containers of Sterno while Michelle the Singing Waitress sang "One Hand One Heart" from West Side Story. And one where the bride and groom emerged from the floor on a rising platform as the room filled with dry ice smoke and Theme from 2001 played. One particularly appalling "Coming Out" (in the spoiled debutante sense) I attended back in the day featured an anatomically correct faux-Greek deity constructed-YES- entirely of terrine. All sorts of vulgar and predictable questions were bruited about. And then there was a catering hall at which I attended the bar mitzhah of someone close to me's son, at which the bathroom came equipped with a TRULY startling variation on "The Singing Waterfall" intended, presumably, to drown out an potentially embarassing "sound leaks." I had to commend the place for their good taste in NOT selecting music to fit the occasion~ it was generic~ but still it was perhaps the most memorable example of good money colliding wioth bad taste I've ever encountered.

So, dont apologise for the contents of that film. I'm sure that SOMEWHERE in Westchester or Nassau County, there really IS such a device that for a nominal sum can be a highlight of any wedding, bar mitzvah, or funeral....at any of which I hope to be.
 
S

sharon rutman

Guest
Here's something else we really don't want to see and it isn't movie related--cutsey newspaper headlines. Check out the following and I'm not making this is up:

'Titantic' force offers proof of biblical Exodus!'

Titantic Ordeal Off Florida.

Is it my imagination or did the wrong ship sink?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

Similar threads